


It's Just How It Is

by Angie_Zero09



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst and Feels, Emotional Hurt, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, Love Confessions, Love Triangle, Mentions of Other Voltron Paladins, Pining Keith (Voltron), Voltron Alternate Universe-Modern Setting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-09
Updated: 2020-07-09
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:33:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25161676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angie_Zero09/pseuds/Angie_Zero09
Summary: You and Keith were best friends in high school. You liked him. He liked you. But you were both scared to confess. You now have a boyfriend. Four years after graduating, you and Keith meet again during the annual high school reunion. Will your feelings for each other resurface as Keith finally confesses to you? And what will happen to your relationship with James?
Relationships: James Griffin (Voltron)/Reader, Keith (Voltron)/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23





	It's Just How It Is

You secured your half updo with the silver pin that your boyfriend gave you before surveying yourself once more in the mirror.

"Not bad. Not bad at all." You say. You wore your Lbd and pearl earrings along with the silver sandals you reserved on special occasions. You felt hands wrap around your waist as your boyfriend nipped the lobe of your ear.

"You look delicious." He breathed. You shivered.

"James..." You wanted to melt in his touch, but you can't. Not yet. You have to attend the high school reunion your class was hosting now. James would also attend, even if he only attended your high school for a year before he transferred. So you pushed yourself away and faced him wrapping both your arms around his neck before kissing him.

"We could do this later, James. After the party. When there's no one to interrupt us anymore." He smiled, raising his hands up. He easily gives in to you anyway. So there's not much argument there.

~~

You arrive at Garrison High along with many other alumni half an hour later. Hooking your arm around James, he guides you along with the throng of people that are attending. The party was held at the gym, the largest area that could hold this many grown adults in a single room. But the doors where opened and the party leaked out in the back of the gym with the party streamers and lights extended outside. There were also a couple of chairs and tables scattered about so anyone who doesn't want to be stuck in a crowded room full of sweaty, half-drunk, grownups could cool off and sober up.

When you entered the building, a bunch of your high school girlfriends latched on you and asked permission from your boyfriend to "borrow you" as they called it. But you know they were only their to get gossip. James reluctantly gave you away before a bunch of other guys began to distract him.

The girls who pulled you away were the few good friends you had before your high school life ended. Nyma, a tall blonde girl who was the cheer captain before was now-you learned- a successful accountant in a law firm. Then there was Nadia and Ina, two complete opposites who both qualified to study in the aviations.

"So, what's new with you and Griffin?" Nadia enthustiastically asked. This was so her.

"What do you mean? You know we're dating." You replied, not wanting to ask any questions. Ina rolled her eyes. What were they talking about? You went to the drinks station-thank god they have an open bar- and faced them after you got your scotch.

"Nadia wants to know- we want to know what progress you have with you and James." Ina explained.

"Like, has he proposed to you yet?" Nyma said happily, clapping her hands. You almost choked on the drink you held. They eyed me eagerly. You were sure if they get the answer they'd wanted now they'd leave you alone to spread the word to the whole world.

"No. It's too early." You sipped on the scotch, not caring that it burned your throat. Nyma and Nadia tutted. With Ina shaking her head.

"Too early? You've been dating that idiot for two years now. It's high time I see a ring on that finger honey." You merely smirked. Then shot a look towards Nyma.

"Well, how about you guys? I heard from James that Rolo asked you out, Nyma?" A blush crept to the blonde girl's cheeks, your suspicions correct.

"He did. We've been going out for a few months now." You all gaped. Sweet, sweet Nyma has a boyfriend now. And her best friend Rolo to top it off. Nyma never had a boyfriend before, despite being the prettiest in our class, and being the cheer captain.

"Finally. Didn't you guys realize you kept on giving each other googly eyes back in high school? And the way Rolo keeps protecting you from other guys?" Nadia said teasingly, which only made Nyma blush harder. You conversed with them before Katie "Pidge" Holt came over your group and joined in on your conversation until the topic went over to her latest inventions.

She gave you a quick explanation of her problem-something involving a modified craft that she was working on and wants Ina or Nadia to look at the blueprints-before we all gathered to where she had dragged us all out into a clearing where a bunch of gadgets and blueprints were scattered on a table. Apparantly, it wasn't only her that was present. Hunk Garrett, Lance McClain, and Keith Kogane were standing there.

Of course. Of course, Keith Kogane was there. As soon as your eyes locked with Keith's, your breath hitched. After all these years, you thought time had made you forget everything. But no. He looked at you the same way you did with him and if you hadn't looked away and excused yourself, you would've panicked. You were already panicking now.

So entering the gym again, you went to the bar and ordered another glass of scotch, expecting to drain your shock away. What you didn't expect was the person who sat beside you and ordered the same drink you had.

"Make it two." Keith said to the bartender, offering a twenty. The bartender pocketed it and began to make the drinks.

"Keith. I didn't know you'd swing by." You said, making casual talk. Your voice betrayed your true feelings.

"I had time." There was thick tension and you didn't like it. He didn't too.

"I thought you didn't drink." Not a question.

"Well. I grew up."

"That doesn't mean drinking scotch, Y/N." There was no way out of this. You knew that talking with Keith would either end up in a fistfight or a lot of words being used to hurt the other.

"Wanna go grab some air?" Surprisingly though, he too didn't push the topic too far. You were more than happy to grab his arm and follow him out the stuffed and noisy gymnasium. Strolling around the gym and feeling the cold air in your flushed skin got you sobered up and you both paused under the old oak tree behind the gym that used to be your's and Keith's hangout spot back in the day.

He also had the same thought as he looked at the decorated tree. "Remember how we used to climb this tree when we were kids? You'd race me everytime and I'd struggle not to fall as you kept on climbing higher and higher." His eyes were glazed with the memory and you followed his gaze as the memories began to come back. You remembered. And you struggled for years to keep those memories in the back of your head as you moved on with your life. Even when you began to date James.

"And when you almost fell... I thought... I thought I was going to lose you." He paused. Then looked at you. "That was the day I realized how much I loved you, YN."

"Keith..." You untangled yourself from him. You saw him flinch, as if he'd been slapped. You regretted that. Just like how you'd regretted every day of your life not telling Keith how you really felt about him. But you had a boyfriend. And you felt sick for even thinking about Keith when you had James.

"Y/N. I love you. I've always loved you. Tell me Y/N. Tell me how you feel. So I know if I'm going to cross the line." He began to press you against the tree. He confessed to you. You didn't even know he felt this way for you and you already decided to end your relationship with him before hearing him out. You were selfish. And sick.

"Keith..."

He was breathing against your neck now. His left hand caressing your forearm. "Tell me Y/N."

"I do Keith. I also do. I've loved you every single day and I regret it. Not saying anything. But I have James now. Please. I don't want James to see how I've always thought of you whenever I see him and hope and pray that he was you instead." Your tears fell as you confessed to Keith. You want him but this wasn't right. He breathed against you one more time before pushing away. You noticed that his eyes were also red. Both of you had cried. Years of pent up emotion finally revealed to each other. You looked down at your feet. He lifted your chin up and wiped your tears before kissing you softly. You wrapped your arms around his neck, making the kiss deeper before you both pulled away. Both of you chuckled. It seems you've made up.

"I'll wait for you, Y/N. No matter how many years it takes." You smiled as he pressed your foreheads together.

"What if I end up marrying James?" You teased, half expecting him to be mad. But he only laughed.

"That won't happen. Not when you know how I feel."

"Y/N." A voice called you. You recognize that voice. Your hands dropped to your sides and stepped backwards from Keith, head whipping to the person who called you.

"James." He stood there. Hands firmly gripping the drink he had in his hand. It looked like it was about to break. His eyes were angry... and hurt. James wanted to say something. But he was shaking. He didn't expect this from you. He knew that you had feelings for your high school best friend but he didn't know you still harboured them. How could he have been so blind. He didn't know what to do so he just backed away into the building. Not caring that some of his friends and fellow classmates saw the whole exchange.

~~

The apartment was dark when you went inside.

"James?" You called out. Stepping carefully inside the darkened living room, you flicked a few lights on and adjusted your eyes to the light as you looked around. The apartment was as just as you left it. Except for James' discarded shoes near the entrance hall and jacket on the sofa, there was no indication of him being there at all.

"James..." You called again, automatically going to the bedroom. You heard his muffled sobs inside and your gut clenched. Knowing that you were the cause of his pain right now hurt. And you wished that meeting Keith today didn't happen. If only you were a little more mature about the whole situation, James wouldn't be-

"Y/N?" James was sitting down on the bed, hands on his face but whipped his head up to meet your gaze as you entered the room, uneasy.

"James... About what happened..."You started but he put his hand up to stop you.

"I know Y/N." He sighed, "I just never thought that you'd still... You call his name at night whenever we sleep, did you know?" He chuckled at the last part, as if it was just a normal thing. You didn't know what to feel at that. Your gut clenched tighter.

"I know I shouldn't be like this right now. I feel like I should be angry at you or lash out or- or something but... I just don't have it in me to do that right now." James was gesturing wildly with his hands then clenchd then unclenched his fists, sighing slowly as he did so. Then he looked at you, his gaze focused and soft, "I guess, I just love you too much Y/N."

You turned your gaze away from him, eyes hazy from the tears that threatened to fall. You want him to be angry at you, but instead life was being cruel to you and let him be somehow okay and calm with what had just happened. You clenched your arms, wanting to apologize or at least explain why you were with Keith. Why that kiss was a spur of a moment feeling you felt after you both confessed after so many years had passed and was not meant to hurt him. And everything that James saw was only a part of what really happened...but, how was explaining anything going to help? He already knew that you still had feelings for Keith and apologizing was just some lame excuse to avoid the blame. Despite knowing that you couldn't stop the words that rolled off your mouth,

"I'm sorry, James." He sighed, as if he heard your train of thought and reluctantly stepped toward you. His hand cupped your cheek before caressing it. You looked at him then, placing your hand on his.

"I think... I think it best that we cool off for a while. Think about where we want our relationship to go from here, Y/N." He started towards the doorway, grabbing a duffel bag that he must have packed before you came in the apartment.

You started to open your mouth to say something, anything, just for him to stay a little longer, but the only sounds that came out of your mouth were choked sobs that you quickly covered with your hand.

James paused by the doorway, debating whether or not to leave then shut his eyes tight, as if by doing so, he could just run out of the apartment and not have to see your sobbing form. He knew you were hurt by his words, no matter how calm and clipped and true the statements he said were. He didn't let room for you to speak either. He didn't want to hear any explanation. He loved you, but he wasn't going to force you to be with him if you really still did love someone else. It wasn't fair. For him and for you. So he had to leave. Your choked sobs and muffled crying were the last that James heard before he closed the door to your shared apartment.

~~

You barely slept that night and the nights following, tossing and turning in your bed that you once shared with James until you forced yourself to sleep on the sofa in the living room just to get that much needed sleep. You still had your work to think about, the only distraction in your life at the moment and even then your mind would go back to the night of your confrontation with James. Your manager noticed this and despite him being a kind soul who had gone through rough times, he'd snap at you to get a grip.

"Separate your personal life when you're at work, girl. Give your mind a break. And it'll all be clear to you then." He'd said to you.

You couldn't understand a thing he just said. Not when your mind was whirring with what-ifs and other questions. But you agreed and let yourself focus on nothing, at least, during work.

But during breaks and when you'd come back at the apartment, you'd scroll through the hundreds of unread texts and calls that you'd recieve throughout the day and hope that one of them came from James. And everytime, your heart sank. Not one from him.

~~

James woke up blinking as the sun was already high up in the sky. The window was free of any blinds, only sheer curtains and he struggled to remember where he was before he sat up, head throbbing from a clear hungover. He sat slowly on the bed, noticing his naked form. He looked around him, his clothes scattered around the bedroom floor along with someone else's clothes and undergarments. These clothes weren't yours.

 _Shit_ ,he thought.

His head was throbbing bad and he couldn't remember if he ever went home with anyone last night after drinking so much at the bar. But from the looks of things, clearly, he had screwed up. Bad. He glanced at the sleeping woman next to him. He should get the hell out of here before she woke up and make matters worse. Gathering himself up, and quickly putting on his clothes he carefully grabbed his wallet and phone and got out of the apartment. There was a lot he needed to do for the day.

~~

"Are you sure about this, bud?" Ryan Kinkade asked as he looked over James.

"I am. I told you already man, Y/N's a good person and she deserves someone who loves her wholeheartedly. I don't think I love her enough for this." James was lounging on his best friend's sofa as Ryan paused the game that they were playing on the screen.

"What's wrong with a one-night stand? Everyone makes mistakes once or twice in their life, right? I mean... she did kiss her guy friend at the reunion." He shrugged, resuming the game. Yeah. You did kiss Keith, but it wasn't intentional. He knew too well that it was more a spur of a moment than anything. He on the other hand...

"I think we need this, man. Letting her go... It will be good if we experience this. We've been relying on each other for two years now without previous experience." James hung his head and looked at the ceiling, not really looking at it.

Kinkade merely shook his head and smirked at his friend before he turned his attention back at the game. The screen displayed a "game over". Kinkade grunted, then sat beside James. "You really love her, don't you?"

"Yeah. And if I have to let her go to be with the man that she cares for then... Who am I to stop her?" James said, imagining your smiling face.

~~

The diner bell rang as you entered the place. "Welcome, hun. Go grab a seat and I'll be with you in a moment." The waitress greeted as you made your way among the packed place. You had gotten a message from James this morning saying that he wanted to meet you in the diner where you first met. And your heart gave a sigh of relief at the message. It meant he wanted to talk and not fight. Maybe to clarify some things and then you'd get to explain. Maybe he was willing to listen now. And you'd finally give him your answer.

"Y/N." A familiar voice and face popped up near the back at one of the booths. James. You made your way through the throngs of people to the booth where James was and sat in front of him.

The waitress who greeted you came around and asked for your orders. "Blueberry pancake for the lady and the house specialty for me, please." James smiled at the waitress, ordering for the two of you. "Oh, and make the pancake double. Thanks, ma'am."

"What a gentleman." The waitress, a middle-aged lady named Emma, chirped as she wrote our order on her paper and went back to the kitchen.

"James." You sighed. "You remembered." You only ordered blueberry pancakes whenever you were unsure of the food choices. Not that blueberry pancakes was always available.

"Of course, I did." He smiled, " What kind of boyfriend would I be. If not blueberry pancake, it'd be waffles or pizza." He chuckled, mentioning the food that you usually ordered whenever you were out. The waitress came back with your orders and winked at the both of you before greeting another customer.

"Let's eat before we talk about anything serious, Y/N." James said as he began to dig in his meat and potatoes dish. You did so with your pancakes and the both of you talked casually, with James usually leading the conversation. It reminded you of simpler times. Back when there was no silent tension surrounding the two of you.

"I've come to a decision." James finally said as you drained the last of your coffee. You simply nodded, knowing that the inevitable cannot be delayed any longer. "I think we should go our separate ways."

What you felt at the words that left his mouth surprised you, "I see..." You muttered under your breath, willing for the hurt and anger that you so wanted to feel to consume you. Instead, what you felt there was a sense of relief and guilt.

"I won't pretend and say that I forgive you, Y/N. 'That humans make mistakes' and all that bullshit." He continued, "I was hurt, and I've spent two years trying to prove my worth to you. Your actions with Kogane...no matter what, _he_ will always be better than me." He finally finished, eyes starting to fill with tears as he looked at you, silently pleading for you to say something.

"I'm sorry I hurt you James. And I'm sorry that most of the time I spent with you was spent thinking of 'what-ifs'. But I never once lied to you when I said I loved you. You are kind and repectful and the most caring person I know and you deserve more. Much more than this horrible person that I am." You looked away for a moment, holding back the tears that threatened to fall. James reached over the table to hold your shaking hand, caressing your knuckles as he did so. Even when he had broken up with you because he was hurting-because of you- he still cares. You wiped your eyes,

"It's alright, James. I can manage. I'll manage." You both sat silent across from each other. The tension ebbing away. The diner was silent again, only you and a few other patrons. Lunch hour already done. James' caressing never ceased, as if he was reluctant to let you go.

~~

James offered to pay for both of your meals despite you wanting to pay for yours. His final acts of being your boyfriend, he said after paying for the food. Then he walked you home- at your shared apartment; you were planning to move out to a studio by the week's end- and when you arrived, quickly gave a quick kiss on his cheek, thanking him. He smiled, a knowing smile, catching on to the unspoken words that you didn't voice out.

"Goodnight Y/N. I truly hope that he's worth it."

"Same to you, James. Look for someone better." You waved goodbye and smiled. He smiled back, one last smile before he turned his back to you and disappeared in your life forever.

**Author's Note:**

> First- thanks to my two friends (Poi and Kate) and my sister who helped in editing and proofreading this mess. Their advice were a huge help in finishing this work that has been sitting on my device for over a month and a half.
> 
> Second- This is my first one-shot fanfic/story published and I would welcome any critiscisms or suggestions about the story, the characters and anything, really. 
> 
> I know the story plot is a bit cliché, and I had hoped for this to end another way, so maybe I'll write something more better next time. That is, if I feel up to it. :)


End file.
